OHH!

Operation Hand History!

When pointedly challenged on the validity of the game PokerFrauds sent me a friendly reply pointing out how the hands were random and they've been certified by some fucking minor country law or accounting firm that everything's cool and you are a jackass. I'm proud to report that I've placed in the money in something like 8 consecutive games with heinously bad cards.

It takes a certain mentality to be willing to fold hundreds of thousands of hands. And I gots it.

Just like Jack Nicholson in Batman, you made me. Live with it. You could have made it an interface for real people to hook up and play a relaxing and challenging game. But you had to push it. You had to let two year olds be succesful and you hired evil non-skilled admins pretending to be real people when they can't stand the temptation to toggle cheat mode.

On every single site.

Every winning hand recquires at least one losing hand. In order to combat me internet poker has made the games so strange that I constantly have to play short stacked.

Screw you. I know the system. And I have infinite patience. And I'm willing to throw off my normal sleep schedule to mess with you, as I did today, and I will do after an early dinner, shower, tactical nuclear strike on a third world country and nap puts me up at something like 2:30 am EST. Bring it on.