Call it fate. Or Karma. Or boredom.
But I just watched the most magical movie this past weekend. You see, there's this girl with really long hair, her name is Rapunzel and there's a prince and it is solid family entertainment without the hint of hot Asian girls.
What the hell am I doing?
The movie is the amazing Rutger Hauer in "Hobo with a Shotgun." It's a beautiful love story about two teenage girls coming of age and....damn dog. Stop messing with the DVD player.
Blue Lagoon? DOG!!!
After being sprayed in the face with formic acid and watching "Them" and "Phantom of the Opera" I think I have some time to type.
Hobo is an over the top revenge flick that substitutes visceral low budget splatter effects for any serious cinematic content. Which makes it my kind of movie and when I latched on to it my eyeballs were wider than Malcolm McDowell in "Clockwork Orange."
By now i trust you notice a ton of film references. And there is a vague reference to Internet Poker buried here. I have a life beyond Internet Poker. By all accounts I should have over a million chips on at least three different sites except for the constant cheating. And I really don't care. Because I'm a hobo with a shotgun. And my shotgun is not loaded with worthless bird shor or buck shot. My shotgun is loaded with screenshot.
PokerStars has not allowed me to win a single hand in the last two nights. I don't really care. Because once again you've embarrassed yourself by lack of consistency on your beloved time bank rules. Look at the chat on the screenshot. One player gets the 14 second warning, doesn't act and his hand is timed out and folded. Same hand, different douchebag, time bank and the inevitable ZZZZZZZ response, which was pretty much the only chat during the whole let us cheat Xenu game.
To quote from "Hobo" -
"You can't solve all the problems of the world with a shotgun."
"It's all I know."
Which other than the comment about having a real life beyond poker is something I will live by. Keep cheating me. Keep giving me the screenshot. We'll call it at best a draw for you, more likely a win for me.
No comments:
Post a Comment