I have become that which I hate the most

Careful now. I mean you, Internet Poker, not me.

I have a series of Demands that must be met before I'm silenced. I will log i and play exceptionally meaningless games despite what chips I have. It's a helluva lot more fun for me to show the innaccuracies than to win. Over loaded on busting on race tables, ot wanting to play a real challenge I decided to bump into my first fixed limit game in a while.

Naturally, crackhead idiot raised on shown cards that he was overmatched on. I raise because I raise because I'm sitting at the table, not because I'm actually thinking about being competitive.

I've owned goldfish that were more competitive than internet poker. At least they raced to the top of the bowl to get food. Instead of feeding someone that's suppossed to be my opponent and dying.

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RIP my goldfish.

Goldie
Golden
Goldelicious
Goldexoitca
Midas
Fort Knox
Goldfinger
Au
Pussy Galore
Jarah's Perfect Golden Skin
Pawnshops at Atlantic City preying on desperate gambling addict (called him Chuck for short)
Shining Dawn
Transition Metal
The Gold Age
Bogus Flop (I fed you dammit. Why are you floating on top of the tank?)
Goldzilla
Tactical Nuclear Fish (bad night... lots of whipped cream, swivel chairs and a bunch of stuff you don't want to know about.)
Ouch! (read above) whipped cream is not good lube.

Hey, I'm not running for a political office, so WTF.

In case events make me change my mind, I do want to state that I'm not a witch.