Namely, in Scarfsburg, Tennessee, they are about to have the biggest ever Ben and Jerry's ice cream eating contest!!! And it only costs $1 to enter!!! And the Asian Babe Unified Flagline (ABUF for short) will perform at halftime!!! (After a short tribute to Brittany Murphy sponsored by Coke.)
In other news, PokerStars is all excited about breaking their Guinness Record for the most Guinness Stout consumed in one tournament. Skip Seville, spokesperson for the brewing company offered these comments-
"We are truly excited to sponsor this great event, and we love the way that we accidentally registered the same name as the record book! We're not sure how much beer artificial intelligence can actually consume. It does tend to gum up the circuits. Coinciding with this, they are trying to get the record for the most players in an online poker game. Karen Lessandless, our official liaison to PokerStars does admit that despite the massive $1 entry fee that there will be liberal amounts of sitting out. We have also worked out a special prize for the player that clicks on the "raise" button the most number of times. This is an event that will surely be more remembered than Menudo concerts and Rick Astley's guest appearance on the L. Ron Hubbard Roundtable."
Sadly, I have to work that night and I'll miss it.And I'll still be on a sugar high from the ice cream and tired from the long trip to Scarfsburg.
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