You couldn't write a better script...

Here I am, sharply critical of the lack of real people playing on Ultimatebet, and they go and do something stupid.

I wasn't in the mood to get cheated at poker. A little blackjack would be fun. Especially to watch players splitting tens and such. Within the first ten hands I found just such a "person." Jester06 splits tens every chance. One hand against a dealer card of a ten value he split pairs of tens into four losing hands. And doubled on a seven count. And the screen shot is his masterful play of two fives with a dealer up card of a 3. The right choice is to double, but of course he split.

Just because the rules allow you to do something doesn't mean you should. And I won enough chips early to linger around and watch other "players" do the same splitting tens nonsense. Just like the instant rasing in a fixed limit game, I'm supposed to believe the entire gambling community plays the same way(which is very aggressive), except me.

But the real gem is from the same screen shot. Just like ANTJE on Absolute that never sleeps and always keeps popping up, I meet a player "4realitis" by name. Granted, this was the first time I saw him. This screen name is at the minimum a strange choice. No doubt in my mind this was a personal message to me.

When I do post infrequently on the bogus fixed limit games, it's usually something like, "You said 'people', that's funny!" Or, "Thank god this is for real." And just like Absolute when I had two consecutive new players taunting me with their screen name with 'chicken' in it I meet a person who's screen name suggests it's for real, even as the rest of the table self destructs and I have to suffer through statiscally unreasonable card play.

I definitely think I've solidified myself as a completely unwelcome guest. This is because I'm willing to not play for real and adjust my play...and play and annoy the admins in charge of the table for as long as possible.

Which is exactly what I did on NLOP this week. Big weekly tournament starts in an hour. I'm in the top 1000 by playing bad poker and folding watching the AI beat itself to death. And when they threw me a first place on Saturday night to make sure I'd qualify (oh, yeah...wish I could record a whole game so you could see how obvious it was), I'm determined not to play in that game. I prepared for it. Changed my screen name to something fairly innocent, but unflattering and vulgar if you think about it. It's eight letters that say, "Screw you, I'm not into your bs. Thanks for the hacking, which I cleaned up, not going to stay on your site long enough for you to do more of that so I can win a lousy keychain, if you deem I worthy of that after struggling through impossibly bad poker."