Yes, go ahead and call me paranoid. But I'm certain I have their attention now. I was supposed to start a fresh site this weekend, but the way that Absolute Poker has so desparately tried to make it look for real the past 18 hours of card play has intoxicated me. 18 hours of poker between Friday night and Sunday afternoon.
I know they want me to go away. I have over 700,000 free money chips, I obviously have some talent, and I've not shown a single sign of breaking out the checkbook and playing for real money. Another one of my theories that they would try to cheat you out of your free money chips is that new players they are courting might accidentally bump up against me and I ruin there day. Or maybe it's just their pride that I have insinuated myself on their database and I'm better than the controller. Or maybe just like strategy games it's supposed to get harder as your rank increases. But this is supposedly poker against real people, and I shouldn't have to fold 90 out of 100 hands to win. And I constantly keep track of how many of those I hands I was bluffed out of or simply destined to lose, and their are precious few winners in there. (And compound this with me constsantly playing high low games with split pots.)
Regardless, their is no doubt in my mind that extreme measures have been taken to make my life uncomfortable. Three times in the last 18 hours of poker I've watched these insane chat sessions where people were putting out big bets that pretty much showed they didn't care about their chips. The chat is supposed to distract me from the cards. I'm supposed to call and lose thinking I'll impress the hot, slutty chick if I win. But, by golly, I sure know how to fold. And frankly I'm surprised that I don't get called out on it. "Hey dude - I noticed you folded, why aren't you playing?" Because I'm throwing my money away. On statistically unreasonable bad cards. And when I finally do get a good hole hand there's always someone there to raise becaue they have a better hole hand.
Recognizing the pattern of pre-flop insane raising the same as on Pokerstars I realized I had a couple of choices. Call and lose. No fun. Do what I did on Pokertsars - become very vocal and vulgar about what I thought about the reasonableness of their site. That backfired and things got more uncomfortable than they already where.
But, I have a new weapon to annoy the game admins. Perfectly within the rules and I don't have to say a thing. Every pre flop raise is met with a time out. The results have been spectacular. While involved with the games with the guy hitting up on the hot slutty chick I should have been targeted as being annoying. Not a peep. And bear in mind that this has gone on for OVER AN HOUR at times.
Mostly it is just that game admins are inserted on every table to liven things up by betting on nothing. Real poker can be awfully boring. With someone always betting every hand the action keeps flowing and the casual player doesn't realize that it's not for real. And I hate training them on what they are doing wrong, but far too often these pre flop raisers are the players that simply cannot lose. They get fantastic cards and fantastic flops.
I'm not wired that way. Omaha high low, I have AA23 and one of the A's is suited. Big bet from the player before me that I'm supposed to call and lose. I time out. You know, slow playing a good hand might actually work, especially if the cards are rigged that you can't lose. But everyone on Absolute bets like an idiot. There's no such thing as checking anything but the most awful of hands.
It's a fact. After four years of this there is no way that I've seen anything like a real poker game on a table full of real people. You raise pre flop, I time out, or at least wait a long time to fold. And this should annoy real people and it hasn't. But the admins in charge of my table probably hate matching up with me. I'm not losing fast enough for them.
Just once I'd like to see a site that advertises "Play against our free training software!" instead of trying to make it look for real, and failing miserably.
Mental note: Annoying the admins when the chat gets really bad - talk about My bike is red.
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